Coming around in this new Torah cycle, something in B’reisheet (Genesis 1:1-6:8) stuck out to me in a new way.
We know the common refrain: “And it was good.”, “It was good.”, “It was good.”
But how closely have we paid attention to the very first “Not Good” of Scripture? It’s not been overlooked, by any means. It is the core of marriage vows. It is the plea of those who pray for spouses. We all know that it is “not good for man to dwell alone” (Gen 2:18).
Still, with all of this attention paid to the solution, I wonder if we have falsely narrowed the scope of the problem. Perhaps it is not simply that a man should have a wife. After all, at the moment of this assertion, Adam — Hebrew for Man, Mankind — is the singular representative of all humanity. “The Woman” is yet to come. It doesn’t mean she’s not represented here. She is represented within Adam. The statement, therefore, is that it is “not good” for humans to dwell alone.
Let’s break it down further. What does “alone” mean? Some of us probably feel like we know exactly what that means. And some might think being alone is a great thing. Some introverts out there are are scoffing at this already. But stick with me. First of all, let’s not think that having the house all to yourself with a food delivery on the way and a binge-able show to stream is the “alone” that Scripture is referring to. We have modern conveniences that allow you to feel alone because you’re not actually talking to people. As long as we’re not being naive, we’ll recognize that doses of “me time” are the healthy side of the coin, whereas the unhealthy side is full of true isolation.
The Hebrew word used in this verse is בַּד. My Hebrew readers are already giggling. It would literally be pronounced: “bad” or “bahd”. So not only is it not good, it’s “bahd”… Get it?
בַּד in other instances translates to “alone, by itself, besides, apart, separation, being alone.” We see it often as, “by themselves” in Gen 21:29; 30:40; 32:16. And “left alone” in Gen 32:24.
Who among us can’t relate to the feeling of being surrounded by people, yet still totally alone? Isolation is real. We all felt it in 2020, for one. But we have felt it throughout our lives. At the lunch table where no one would join us. At the party where no one would talk to us. In the circumstances where no one will listen to us. In the difficult times when no one can understand us.
Moses was not able to bear the people alone. Therefore the LORD appointed 70 elders to stand with him. (Num 11:14-16)
Man does not live by bread alone. But by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of the LORD. (Deut 8:3)
As far back as Genesis 2:18, it seems that the LORD is anticipating how to help us through our troubles. The answers He presents are intimate companions, others who can help to shoulder the same burdens, and the wisdom and teachings of Scripture. Put away your modern perception for a moment and ask yourself,
“Where did a person in ancient times go for connection with believers and to hear the Word of the LORD?”
Don’t forget, The Bible as we know it now: on our phones, maybe with multiple copies in the house in multiple translations, is a luxury that would leave any believer prior to the 20th century salivating. We are blessed beyond belief. I even have a friend who does ministry in Africa. When he comes to the US to speak, he reminds us, “You have what the rest of the world is dying for.” We have an abundance of the Word and an abundance of people who live by it.
In recent decades, the trend of isolation has modified our worship. Internet teachers and preachers have allowed us to listen at any time to any person of our choosing. Our questions can be asked, not only of blog writers and comment boards, but now of AI, in lieu of seeking out a pastor, priest, or rabbi. Our study can be self-affirmed across platforms that are citing none but each other as authorities. Our prayer requests can be anonymously submitted over the phone or in an email.
It’s a double-edged sword and we all know it. There is great benefit to the fact that we can access such abundance with so much ease. But it’s imperative that each of us, individually, weigh the burden that we carry when we seek to walk this walk all alone.
When we act in isolation, there are certain needs that we end up satisfying with substitutions. The word “pervert” is the best descriptor here. The most common perversion that befalls many is that of substituting companionship and choosing artificial means to satiate lustful desires. But consider all the ways that we use substitutions to pervert what is truly needed for the well-being of our hearts, minds, and souls. I’ll not spend too much time here getting creative. Rather, let’s get right down to the point:
There is something perverse about giving up community to choose, instead, a congregation of one. Not only does it pain me to characterize it like that because there is no such thing — a congregation, by definition, is many. But it pains me to think that someone reading this in isolation might think, “I have everything I need. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
- Isolation is a convenient way to decide upon and defend all of your actions by yourself. That’s fine if you simply want to feel like you’re right. But it’s not okay for you to take counsel among none but yourself and think that’s righteous.
- Companionship was established in Genesis as an answer to being alone, which is “not good”. It is, in itself, a solution to a problem. If your isolation has lead you to believe that you have found the better solution, I challenge you to pray on such things. What do you know about your nature that the LORD does not?
- If you have chosen to isolate based on prior emotional and spiritual wounds, just remember that measurable life expectancy for a person in a community is 15 years longer than that of someone living in isolation. If that’s true even regarding our physical well-being, how much more is our spiritual well-being dependent upon communal healing? If you’re hurt, seek healing. Pursue peace. Find help. Stop looking for good people and instead look for people who seek good. (They will break your heart sometimes. But they will also work for healing and peace.) Trust the LORD to guide you to them.
This brings me finally to those who are in community, but still feel isolated. It’s real. It’s common. And it needs to be addressed.
When you are in a large crowd of believers but feel alone, ask if you’re working or if you’re supervising. If you are, in fact, working and you still feel alone, it would stand to reason that you’re surrounded by others who are merely supervising. One who is working alone is well aware of their situation. Otherwise, you might conclude that you have been supervising if you recognize any of the following: you’ve been watching the worship and behaviors of others and you’re not liking what you see; you’ve assessed the program of the services and you have opinions on corrections or improvements; you’ve distinguished by immediate uptake who is going to be a good worker under your supervision and who will not be. A worker has a list of tasks and duties that they need to accomplish. A supervisor has a list of tasks and duties that they expect another to accomplish. A worker is one who welcomes others at their side to help them accomplish their tasks. A supervisor expects to be singular in assigning their tasks to their small circle of trust. Do you see how it is possible to isolate one’s self even inside of a crowd? When work needs to be done, it will be obvious who wants which role. And let me assure you, among the body of believers, work needs to be done!
There is a word in Scripture that many of us know: “kadosh”. To be “holy” and “sanctified”, you may be aware, means to be “set apart”. So why is it holy to be separate, but perverse to be isolated? The answer lies in the use of the words in Scripture. For one, the premise of this blog: “it is not good for man to be alone”. But also that the faithful are regularly called to a holy convocation. So the distinction is clear:
Separated-Aloneness = Bad
Separated-Togetherness = Good
Not only is the “separated-togetherness” of holiness a good thing, it’s something we crave without knowing it. It is something that our Creator has instilled within us a desire to achieve. And He has delineated ways for us to satisfy our desire for separated-togetherness in a fruitful way. The words “Holy Convocation” occur no less than 30 times in the KJV. Throughout Leviticus 23 and Numbers 28 & 29, there are commands to gather in a Holy Convocation for the Holy Days.
Ah! So separate-togetherness isn’t just a state of being. It’s an occurrence that has purpose and yields fruit. What is the purpose of a holy convocation? We set aside work to focus on the LORD. We set up remembrances of His mighty deeds. We rejoice with one another and worship the LORD in one voice.
By contrast, what is the purpose of choosing separate-aloneness? Rather, what is the result? We trick ourselves into isolated worship when we think that the echo chamber is enough. I don’t doubt the Spirit’s ability to speak to your heart through a 10-year-old online message. But don’t you open up your heart to the Spirit when you let Him work through the words of another who can see you and experience you in the moment? Don’t we all know how hard it is to remind ourselves of anything? It’s better to externalize our reminders and to walk through the remembrances of the LORD with others who have seen His mighty works. And it may be your option to choose your music and to belt it out at the top of your lungs, but ask yourself whether that sounds sweeter to the LORD than a crowd of His children singing to Him in unity.
That’s the purpose of all of this; isn’t it? Unity. Everyone loves the idea of unity until they actually have to unify. The verb is so much trickier than the noun. If anyone reading thus far feels convicted in any way, I imagine it’s on a level of, “I know. I agree. But I still have my favorite teachers, my personal worship time, and I need to be allowed to be alone with the Spirit every once in a while.” Fine. I am not arguing that.
I only want to present the seriousness of the situation. I want to raise up the fence and delineate which side of separateness is good and which is bad. Because, lately, we’re hopping over the line like it’s some sort of jump rope. How else can I tell you that there’s a cliff over here? It is not good to be alone!
Find a community. Be community for others. Humble yourself to seek what the LORD has in store for you. Be open to restoration and surprises! Heal from your wounds with the help of others.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious ointment upon the head, that ran down upon the beard, even Aaron’s beard: that went down to the skirts of his garments; As the dew of Hermon, and as the dew that descended upon the mountains of Zion: for there the LORD commanded the blessing, even life for evermore. [Psa 133:1-3 KJV]